Simply One of Severely Clashing Thought

I’m only your little hand puppet,
leveling a really fierce criticism,
because you wouldn’t ask for it,
from any other helpless rudiment,
speaking truth to power and more,
obviously launched out all tongues,
attempting a curious game of sides,
which to snare in a lie before dying.

Come now, you know damn well thousands were crucified, boy,
maybe hardly exactly the same precise ghastly way,
yet this drastically shifts what I was claiming, deaf imbecile,
but who honestly has a trusted old record of that time period,
listing off intricate details about every single crucifixion,
okay, so kindly shut down the whole spanking yourself routine, my dreary,
while we’re of course hopelessly trying to eat a bite here, numskulls,
just use a pathetic mirror to grossly gaze over your ugly empty hide.

Yeah, we be partying righteously through your house darkly, moron,
below passionately drinking across our sorry knees,
with millions of pathetic stevedores,
quickly on and off deck, ha,
prior to scurrying beyond different lives entirely,
scattering a very similar message, indeed,
merely rearranging the awful wording,
except they contain sincerely nothing understood or needed.

Ha, udder cheers to our divine Freedom of Speech, friends and fiends; either you love it, or you can mightily shove it, baby!

Chef Paula Deen In Shades

“Aw, damn straight, little brothas and sistas of ma vera own blessed children, blasted out a helluva different mudda and a half, we most seriously had dem Vegas showgirls/whores sheeet-tied like yelpin’ two-year-old dirty pigs, silky stirred fried beyond dare smoky goodness run gushin’ madly from eva repulsive orifice, fresh fo da picnic table wit sum down-home wholesale slaughta and weekend notin’-betta-ta-do-but-eat-and-eat-mo bar-be-cue!”

“Mercy, folks, I wanna suppose a steaming toast to myself and the extremely hard work in putting up a pretty swell and greasy wall of stiff defiance against literally millions of nosy questions about my private social life, far in the distance of prying eyes, ears, and who freaking knows what else these evil pathetic heathens have imprudently hatching across… Oh, paleeze, it’s simply so totally disgusting, I absolutely refuse now to even waste any extra brain cells that are left passing over it!”

“Yeah, mamma, then I says, ‘Hey, honey,
take a sweet slide on the buttery side!’
And of course those luscious colored girls go,
‘Doo do doo do doo do do doo…’ until you’re furiously tearing your dime store hair apart at its wiry prosthetic seams!”

“Whoa, got me and ma posse wakin’ in da mornin’,
ah, where y’all bin given yo final warnin’,
hey, thins is always bornin’,
if ma fans jess suddenly drop bein’ adornin’,
cuz da liberal media is constantly scornin’,
poor, poor beautiful yos truly!
Ugh, Jesus, come off it, less hear ya stoopid colored girls already!”

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!

Urrgh, I’m so sick to absolute death,
of this bleeding, dumb father-humper,
pissed down from idiots and victims,
dragging us all below our gross civility,
when we can’t even honestly account,
if there existed such a moronic beast,
let alone actually supposedly knowing,
a damn flake about His alleged ministry!

Jesus is vainly rumored every place and hour,
certainly in many more failed concepts also,
like representing a sin or blood sacrifice,
although His sorry backside precisely lacks,
easily any of their necessary requirements,
while being something the New Testament,
surely could manage to doctor its books with,
He still falls hopelessly short of old prophecies.

Besides, these hoisted, made up vast alliances,
related to simply positive ideas and components,
are plainly foolish to keep a tracking record for,
since others effortlessly figure negative ones as well,
possibly leveled by people much akin to myself,
yet both would rest on unfounded hearsay evidence,
forgetting what’s most important is remaining vigilant,
to ancient Jewish predictions of the claimed savior.

Uh, please excuse the wee mess, doll, but you’re sort of interrupting me a bit as I’m practically finished marking my valuable territory.

Dog With Toys

“Hey, what say we promptly reserve a couple of hours, and grab one of them weird flying discs over to the beach? Whoa yeah, and yet again, I’ll merely pretend to chase it while actually mainly putting the ol’ naughty cross hairs of my mighty horny scopes above some very fine bitches in hot tiny bikinis!”

“Easy, baby, I ain’t fondling your little precious singles collection from only nineteen-seventy-freaking-four! Geez, you seriously gotta learn to trust me after all of our many highly productive years being quite happy together without a fatality… Er, okay, nearly…”

“Aw, come now, sweetie, why must you desperately commandeer the vast majority of my fun playthings to thoroughly abuse toward a simply miserable demise during those numerous, ahem, private pleasure sessions? Ugh, you know damn well these are hardly love beads, deary, so next time, kindly try stuffing a filthy J-Lo size rosary up that moorish southern pie-hole, instead!”

“Oh, best watch how far you dig about this foul basket, honey, or you may reluctantly uncover my putrid cache of a few ghastly presents left around since the last evening you absentmindedly forgot to take me on a teeny walky-poo. Ha, unless you’re honestly searching here for another trifling quaint memento to have bronzed!”