Numerous mistranslations are simply ‘little’ problems,
which again, could be explained away,
except I’m interested in the ones touted by supporters,
and faithfully unable to merely turn their backs to,
since they remain a very crucial part of the religion.
Look, many Christians reject the idea of Hell,
thinking it contradicts Jesus’ general message of love,
but I don’t see it near probable,
when what actually manages the job truthfully enough,
is easily demonstrated in life on a daily basis.
Yeah, and Jesus had kind of a small piece in creating,
even if it readily contains examples of stark beauty,
it also showcases a lot of ugliness as well,
honestly revealing His supposed weeping and sympathy,
forced as just a vast mockery of crocodile tears.
Meaning there is no new or old law used,
only the Law handed down atop Mount Sinai,
thus clearly proclaimed in Deuteronomy Four,
never to add or take from for all time to pass,
evidently barring Jesus’ later moronic corruptions,
spoken under pretentious threats and riddles,
leveled with shameful lies and trickery,
in order to get people figuring they’re witless,
assuming a human sacrifice somehow fulfilled this edict.
“Er, dude, I’m a bit of a comedian, so do you mind if I practice a little of my latest routine while you’re setting up that camera? Yeah? Good, here goes:
‘Damn, bruh, what’s wit dem lousy bitches and hoes constantly talkin’ ’bout dare stupid periods all da time? Lord have mercy, I’s definitely don’t needs any ov dat wack sheeet! Look, man, if I’s wanna know ov sometin’ leakin’ blood, it batter ba ma vera rare steak smothered in mushrooms and red onions!'”
“Why, thank you; you’re too kind! Okay, folks, I’ll introduce you to the scene thus far, see, this waiter is bringing soup to a customer’s table:
‘Ah, your soup, sir; enjoy.
Hey, waiter, there’s a fly in it!
Oh, my goodness, I’m so dreadfully sorry to both of you! Honestly, sir, I didn’t realize that I had mistakenly passed you the fly’s soup by accident! Please, forgive the mix-up, and I’ll be right back with yours in a minute, sir.’
Ha, now a wee different take on the same joke, is the ol’ thumb position; observe:
‘Aw, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
Uh, please, begging your pardon, sir, but this isn’t my thumb.
Oh my God, that’s truly disgusting!
Come on, what’s the big deal, sir? Geez, I took a bath this week.'”
“Finally, fiends, it seems when I like people, they’re not around enough, but when I suddenly don’t like a certain person, I practically see his smug, grinning face everywhere! Ugh, I guess I really ought to get rid of my Justin Bieber wallpaper…”
God, we’re so stupid, Boy,
You must house more gems,
crammed up that stinking hole,
of course turned back into coal,
aw, it’s really too perfect,
maybe next visit, Lord Shoal!
Fight with this encounter, Daughter,
and see if You will possibly contend,
grappling Your sorry cross for once,
leveled during my vehement belligerency,
under our audience’s war of words,
quarrel, then contest until ol’ Father hears!
Push in every odd tussle or three,
wrestle over stainless chickens and doves,
against Your pesky haunting rivalry,
because Baby can’t take competition,
throughout His mock trials and aims,
endeavoring below a thoughtless venture!
Controversy dribbles atop rags from Your lips,
simply coasting by those laughably ordered events,
attempting One’s pathetic luck at His staged crack,
quite labored, unworthy of chance or hazard,
essays blowing around litigated rocks and sand,
nearly impossible they speak the truth of anything!
“Hey, friends, if you imagine this anywhere near counts as a supposed bad hair moment, you’re absolutely freaking wrong! See, instead, we seriously got ourselves a fairly sweeping twist in terms of how distorted things did truly settle across many dreadful occasions up there! Now, if we could please try to squeeze past your mighty shallow judgments regarding mere external appearances… Jesus, just say it, no need to underplay it, I will sincerely listen to your critical communiqué, without laughing, even it’s one big cliché, then after you’re duly finished, we can stop by a pathetic cybercafé, and you can furiously write the whole stinking dossiér to headline your stupid blog, right away!”
“Er, you must believe me, dear, I honestly think the style you’ve chosen is hella great, and I only wish my ‘do was half as nice as yours!”
“Aw, come on, idiot, you know damn well I specifically asked for you to put condoms over those huge nasty suckers before somebody gets a vile disease and/or preggers!”
“Look, bruh, it surely ain’t my fault here, because they were already fully erect when I arrived in the morning!”
“Yikes, today is definitely the very last time we buy non-kosher hot dogs from that confounded butcher!”